Jim SpearsA Downer for Cyprus
July 14th 2008 06:18
Alexander Downer, AKA Alexander Downer, starts his United Nations position today. “Alexander Downer” is leaving politics, well meaningful politics anyway, heading for Cyprus as a U.N. Special Envoy.
“Alexander Downer and the U.N.” could be the most inspired romantic comedy in years representing the culmination of a love affair between soul-mates. Both Alexander and the U.N. derive their authority from the past; for the U.N. it is “The League of Nations” and World War II, for Alexander Downer it is his father and grandfather. The Downers Snr were politicians and that name recognition allowed Alexander Downer to rise quickly to the newly created seat of Mayo in 1984. Alexander Downer has also been the beneficiary of redistribution. When 21.3% of the 1990 vote went to a Democrat there was redistribution, in 1998 when Downer held on by 1.7% there was redistribution. The historical record will show that the seat was “invented” in 1984 for a Liberal scion and whenever he looked like getting tossed his seat was secured for him. Anything that relies on dynasty to maintain its position is in trouble; consider the English royals or the Bush family of Texas. Add to this list the Downers of South Australia and Edward Downer is warned: Enter Federal politics and I will have your head on a pike.
Removing someone’s head from their body isn’t something to joke about and maybe Alexander isn’t the problem. Minister for Foreign Affairs is a shitty position…You only ever kiss ass. You go nowhere troubling, only dispatched to friendly nations. For example at the height of the Iraq War Alexander Downer went to America to meet with Condoleezza Rice…they played golf and went to the baseball. Being Foreign Minister for eleven years is not very impressive, especially with such an otherwise patchy history; Alexander Downer spent just eight months as Liberal leader, four months as Shadow Minister for the Arts, eight months in Housing and Small Business, under a year in defence. Short stints in multiple ministries the resume of an incompetent golden boy. When I hear his indignant, superior voice I just want to hit the television screen. Not in frustration but because I want to hit him but that is my, very real, problem.
Everyone has problems though; even the U.N. operates with the anxiety of becoming irrelevant. Passing the Security Council with ideas of war is easier than passing Monopoly’s go but with greater financial rewards. Iran recently boasted that they are economically independent of the U.N. Imposing economic sanctions is cool but that curtails investment while the demand for oil keeps Iran afloat. When will demand for oil abate? U.N. reform is probably an easier, quicker option.
The U.N. is nothing more than the reform of an, older, irrelevant body. There was a great war, to end all wars, WWI, which gave us “The League” which gave us WWII. The winners of WWII created their fair system, the U.N. but they maintained the power structure you know the one: America, England, France, Russia and China. Around 2005 the share of global GDP contributed by “developing” economies reached 50% but the U.N. has remained bound to the post-World War II world. It needs a shake up, introduce a few Asian nations including Islamic West Asian governments, chuck Brazil in the mix. (Before you lefties jump up about human rights remember that your Tibetan fad obliges you to be opposed to China who are on the S.C. and calling for them to be removed means making the U.N. truly obsolete as opposed to merely irrelevant).
The U.N. is capable of appearing obsolete without making changes to the S.C. Some ceasefires, like Cyprus’ 34 years, have been in place for decades preventing an escalation of or natural end to conflict. The cost is $51, 900, 00 p/y and while the genocidal squeeze on Greek Cypriots and Maronites has abated the hatred remains. Hatred is rechannelled into stubborn resistance to legislative change and the process tumbles along. If the U.N. leaves then people on both sides are unemployed and have no outlet. Maybe some issues can only be resolved through eradication or relocation. If the U.N. existed in 732 B.C. the Philistines and the Assyrians would still be negotiating and we’d have no word for people who lack class and culture.
Negotiations and political manoeuvring are typical of democratic institutions so the U.N.’s failures come from its structural weaknesses. The best solution is to buttress the structure and correct the inefficiencies rather than destroy the whole thing. How much change it can withstand is an unknown but we must act because otherwise in 20 years they will claim we “faked” Africa; creating a conspiracy like the moon landing, JFK’s assassination and so on.
“Alexander Downer and the U.N.” could be the most inspired romantic comedy in years representing the culmination of a love affair between soul-mates. Both Alexander and the U.N. derive their authority from the past; for the U.N. it is “The League of Nations” and World War II, for Alexander Downer it is his father and grandfather. The Downers Snr were politicians and that name recognition allowed Alexander Downer to rise quickly to the newly created seat of Mayo in 1984. Alexander Downer has also been the beneficiary of redistribution. When 21.3% of the 1990 vote went to a Democrat there was redistribution, in 1998 when Downer held on by 1.7% there was redistribution. The historical record will show that the seat was “invented” in 1984 for a Liberal scion and whenever he looked like getting tossed his seat was secured for him. Anything that relies on dynasty to maintain its position is in trouble; consider the English royals or the Bush family of Texas. Add to this list the Downers of South Australia and Edward Downer is warned: Enter Federal politics and I will have your head on a pike.
Removing someone’s head from their body isn’t something to joke about and maybe Alexander isn’t the problem. Minister for Foreign Affairs is a shitty position…You only ever kiss ass. You go nowhere troubling, only dispatched to friendly nations. For example at the height of the Iraq War Alexander Downer went to America to meet with Condoleezza Rice…they played golf and went to the baseball. Being Foreign Minister for eleven years is not very impressive, especially with such an otherwise patchy history; Alexander Downer spent just eight months as Liberal leader, four months as Shadow Minister for the Arts, eight months in Housing and Small Business, under a year in defence. Short stints in multiple ministries the resume of an incompetent golden boy. When I hear his indignant, superior voice I just want to hit the television screen. Not in frustration but because I want to hit him but that is my, very real, problem.
If you look closely you can see Condy wishing she was elsewhere
Everyone has problems though; even the U.N. operates with the anxiety of becoming irrelevant. Passing the Security Council with ideas of war is easier than passing Monopoly’s go but with greater financial rewards. Iran recently boasted that they are economically independent of the U.N. Imposing economic sanctions is cool but that curtails investment while the demand for oil keeps Iran afloat. When will demand for oil abate? U.N. reform is probably an easier, quicker option.
The U.N. is nothing more than the reform of an, older, irrelevant body. There was a great war, to end all wars, WWI, which gave us “The League” which gave us WWII. The winners of WWII created their fair system, the U.N. but they maintained the power structure you know the one: America, England, France, Russia and China. Around 2005 the share of global GDP contributed by “developing” economies reached 50% but the U.N. has remained bound to the post-World War II world. It needs a shake up, introduce a few Asian nations including Islamic West Asian governments, chuck Brazil in the mix. (Before you lefties jump up about human rights remember that your Tibetan fad obliges you to be opposed to China who are on the S.C. and calling for them to be removed means making the U.N. truly obsolete as opposed to merely irrelevant).
The U.N. is capable of appearing obsolete without making changes to the S.C. Some ceasefires, like Cyprus’ 34 years, have been in place for decades preventing an escalation of or natural end to conflict. The cost is $51, 900, 00 p/y and while the genocidal squeeze on Greek Cypriots and Maronites has abated the hatred remains. Hatred is rechannelled into stubborn resistance to legislative change and the process tumbles along. If the U.N. leaves then people on both sides are unemployed and have no outlet. Maybe some issues can only be resolved through eradication or relocation. If the U.N. existed in 732 B.C. the Philistines and the Assyrians would still be negotiating and we’d have no word for people who lack class and culture.
Negotiations and political manoeuvring are typical of democratic institutions so the U.N.’s failures come from its structural weaknesses. The best solution is to buttress the structure and correct the inefficiencies rather than destroy the whole thing. How much change it can withstand is an unknown but we must act because otherwise in 20 years they will claim we “faked” Africa; creating a conspiracy like the moon landing, JFK’s assassination and so on.
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